My relationship with Akri isn’t perfect. Does this surprise you? It shouldn’t. We’re much like any other couple. And with my mental disorders, it only makes things more difficult because I purposely try and push everyone away. But in the moments when my emotions aren’t on overload, I can think clearly and know what I need to change in order to make this better for both of us.
As Akri’s submissive, things need to be more difficult for me. Especially now that we have Morika with us as well. As the alpha, I ought to be held to a higher standard. This is something that I want personally, not just because the situation has changed. I think I would have desired it regardless. I say this so our little bird doesn’t think it’s because of her and take it upon herself to feel guilty.
I would also like more opportunities to be sensual versus being sexual. Because I’m a succubus, I tend to be seen only as a sexual creature and that disturbs me slightly. I want to get in tune with the side of me that desires the touches, the kisses, the holding, but not necessarily the sex.
Part of me wants to feel so owned that it appears Akri has no care for my well-being. I know he does and I will always know that, but there’s something about the need to be used in every way possible that Akri could think of. It’s such a base need of mine that it’s almost embarrassing how much I need it. But I do need it. I need that feeling of being owned and that I’m nothing but what Akri says I am.
I normally wouldn’t be talking about what I want, but Akri insisted. I really think what should change should be up to him with minimal input from me. But he wants my input and he is Akri, so he will get my input.