Today, I put myself out there. Took a leap of faith. Trusted in the faith others had in me. And it showed me something. Faith isn’t just something that one can have about the universe at large or even smaller phenomena. I can have faith in myself.
It might be weird of me to not have known this, but when you realize I was constantly told how useless I was since birth, I never really put much thought into really believing in myself. After all, even being born, I was a mistake. I wasn’t my older sister who died and never had a chance at life. I wasn’t the son my father wanted.
But none of that matters now. I am Lilikka. A strong woman. Yes, I have many problems that I still need to work through and I’m sure that I’ll even falter in feeling as strong as I do right now, but this is testament to the fact that I am capable. I just need to take that first step off the cliff and trust in myself that I’ll make it down safely.